whatcha mean you cant get rid of genital warts? thats not what my girlfriend says
I have had it with that bitchy sack of crazy. Iam done!
She said she had a thing for dinosaurs. Come get me now
Dont judge me. Him and his friends got me drunk for free, the least i could do was suck his dick
Honestly, I don't care if the only reason she gave me her beer was because she was bisexual and wanted to touch my vagina. Beer is beer.
i've hooked up with him and three of his roommates and not a single one of them knows about it..think its safe to say i found the silver lining in a boys inability to communicate
I mean it was like cry my eyes out or masturbate in my moms bathroom.
We're stoned and watching little Einstein videos. Come. Over. Now.
They said I was more of a mess than the German. I have achieved the unachievable, you may bow down to me
And then after we fucked he wouldn't stop calling me "champ". It was like I had sex with an extremely attractive soccer coach
Went to work in the same clothes from last night, completely covered in glitter...I didn't choose the hag life, the hag life chose me
Also, you need to stop getting hammered and taking showers with people.
I feel like your personal Bdsm barbie...
i just ran butt naked down the hall and someone highfived me. i love college.
If you wanna do actual business call my office. If you’re just looking to get laid you need to up your game
Randomize
