Yesterday I was informed there is a jewish dating website called jdate, I'm considering joining out of academic curiosity
Is it necrophilia if we're both dead?
just caught grandpa beating off in the living room
i just got a UPS package from a name and address i dont know, with one of my thongs in it. no recollection.
I hate bills.
Like ones you have to pay or people named William?
I just had teddy grams, ritz crackers, and twizzlers for dinner. Hello, end of the semester.
At what number of girls whose last names are stored in your phone book as drinking establishments does it become excessive?
I don't remember. I think I elluded to the fact that I would buy him a dildo for his birthday.
Get out here. Doing shots with the delivery guy. Also, the food is here
Every time I get scared about the fact that I'm falling for him I remember that he juggles and is hung like a mastadon and everything is a-ok.
Dude it's SB. It's a proven fact that all you need to survive on is beer, weed, chips and maybe some amphetamines
i wore a power symbol belly button ring just so i can drunkenly tell him that he turns me on. i dont care if it works i think its classy
IM TRYING TO SAY GOODNIGHT STOP FOR LIKE FIVE SECONDS WITH THE DICK SUCKING
I like it here so far, only people are a lot less accepting of my terrible decisions and it's cramping my style
It was all going good until I realized she was wearing underwear with a butt flap. Mission aborted.
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