I only have two rules. But i've fotgotten those rules and replaced them w 2 other rules
I swear I am going to pee, wipe my vag with my hand, and then slap you in the face with it.
Omg Kevin Jonas is engaged!!!!!!
Omg really? To who. Gay marriage is only legal in like 3 states.
yea ive hooked up with like half those guys
and i've hooked up with the other half...when our powers combine, we are captain slutbag
There's a group of australian girls next to me. can't take them seriously. think they are going to turn into mr g
Hey man, did I leave the bottom drawer to my refrigerator that I had beer in at your house by any chance?
i just burped and it tasted like condom. please tell me i wasn't lame and made that guy wear one for a bj last night.
chlamydia ends and my period begins. this isnt real life
Were playing beruit winners pelt losers with eggs
I'm amazed your boyfriend is still with you, how do you manage to pee on him while he is holding you in his lap?
I just realized that the thing that smelled like an electrical fire in my house was me.
.It's like gods test of willpower against vaginal comfort
I could drive to your house and kick you in the nuts right now....and not even stop for a burrito
Elliott peed on my floor and slept in it lol that's a one line description.
Random question, what's John-that-we-had-a-threesome-with's phone number? Don't necessarily need the full number, maybe just area code? Think I drunkenly ran into him last night and now I have texts from a John.
Randomize
