Do I give off a "I have a sex tape" vibe???
We need to get cat food
Nevermind, the cat will eat lucky charms
then she woke up from sleeping for an hour and the first thing she said was "i regret it already"
$3 wine plus diet sprite does not make good champagne.
does taste better than andre tho
just smoked a blunt while listening to nsync. i now know what my childhood was missing.
I may also break bread with strippers. Because it is passover.
I call it my summer of slut; except summer lasts from May until December. It's been incredibly successful
4 months of living in europe has taught me the art of making a drunken stumble look like a dance move
Serious question: when you had my right nipple in your mouth, did my nipple ring have both of the balls on it, or was it missing one. Current situation: missing one.
Sometimes I have to make sure these messages are going to you and I'm not about to give someone in my phone book a heart attack.
I should rephrase... I'm trying to not sit on other peoples faces besides my boyfriends.
I'm hoarding IKEA meatballs in my purse
I was gonna make a strong case for you to be my midnight kiss, but poptarts sound good too
I have hobbies that aren't destroying myself and others...i can make hats.....
His sister gave me the "if you hurt him I will break your neck" talk. I didn't know how to tell her we're not a couple.
Randomize
