Sarah, plain, and tall I adore you
I missed Saved by the Bell this morning, but Ashley in a later episode of Fresh Prince is keeping the morning wood alive.
after taking her first shot and having her first random hook up she finally feels like she is ready for college
she has no idea
im so poor im using the bottom of my laptop to heat my food.
So I'm seriously not complaining - but I just fell ass backwards into a Tuesday night threesome. Sober
He wore my sunglasses on his honeymoon..... so there's that.
I hope my orgasm sounds aren't secretly that bad and no one tells me
How does this dude know what a dying walrus sounds like? That's the real question
Like fighting the continuous urge to sing Neil diamond "coming to America" kinda fucked up right now
He said bow chicka bow wow. I never thought being sexually degraded would be such a turn on.
Oh Brad. Your poor brain, always being ignored for your penis and crazy women.
he gifted me a vibrator as he was breaking up with me. you tell me how my night went
Hey, you remember years ago when you told me you would give me a kidney?
You have to sext the same way you right a resume, you can only use active verbs
This girl just said she was late for class because she was having sex.
I'm not sure how to explain it, but I feel like our penises have a connection. Like long lost brothers. We're not even gay.
Randomize
