nosebleed girl is getting lots of praise
I think I'm pregnant with his hipster baby. It keeps kicking my stomach to the beat of mgmt songs.
You realize we can hear you jacking off in your room, right?
I like it rough
Cant decide who was more of a mess the morning after... me when i passed out in the bathroom stall or you when you sprayed yourself down with hairspray thinking it was sunblock
this is really not the time to pretend we have morals
We are going out Saturday. Oh and we might also be jousting on bikes.
yeah, that's what i said too. right before i tackled that street sign.
He just told an 8 year old to go fuck himself so we probably won't be in the butterfly exhibit much longer.
you were yelling that somebody needed to take your bra off with such enthusiasm my first thought was that you were on fire.
After my date left I rallied and took the Asian girl home. Flexibility my friend.
Well. Now I feel like I put pants on for nothing.
You are the jesus of drinking
Seriously, you just banged the guy that wishes his dog happy birthday on fb. That's fucking adorable!
Secrets from the porn industry: liTERALLY SHOVE A SEA SPONGE UP YOUR VAGINA GO ON DO IT
He's here walking around DRUNK AS FUCK in a Kobe Bryant number 8 jersey... Tucked in.
Randomize
