You're my favorite asian/girl I've met here.
You're ridiculous
Your hot
I cannot stress to you how much better your current situation is than listening to gay sex
Brutally Honest is my real middle name, Princess just sounds better.
mike has just informed me of all the things he would put in his pussy if he was a woman. this includes door stops, power drills & g.i. joes.
"and then my dad would be all like 'hey mike, where's the remote?'"
i'd date him for the sole reason that he thanks me after giving him head
Just saw a woman with a Pomeranian in her bra. Way to step up your game Seattle.
Then he wanted a handjob in the car. While my cousin was driving. To krispy kreme. And there was someone else in the backseat.
Jesus...So southern.
My coke dealer 411'd my work number just to see how I was doing and gave me his new number. He must miss my business
Honestly I will go to church for him, I will even try to quit smoking for him. But his dick is not worth losing alcohol. He sure as fuck isn't taking away our wine nights.
The cop left me alone after I gave her my spare snow cone. It was a hot and humid day and that uniform looked stuffy. Yay stoner me for overindulging in icy treats.
It's not that I even wanna fuck these guys anymore, just cuddle that's all. My conscience has never been so proud.
Let's make an agreement. No drugs until you finish all your homework. I'm hiding them as we speak.
His roommates are gone so we had sex in every room of the house and watched the wire. What have you done today?
Never admit to being cold at those things. That is how you end up waking up the next morning naked under animal pelts... or so I have heard.
I'm crying watching Rihanna at the VMAs. Periods are a bitch
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