Booty call?
Dude you don't even follow my twitter
trying to fathom saturday night and the fact that Rainn Wilson now hates me. my brain hurts.
Its Shannon Doherty lazy not Forest Whittaker lazy
Your favorite bartender is back from prision
At what number of girls whose last names are stored in your phone book as drinking establishments does it become excessive?
and the award for most disgusting thing ever done on my couch now officially goes to you! Congratulations, you won the couch...I can't even look at it anymore.
I just had some guy offer to eat me out on my lunch break... I think single life is getting better everyday
It's a gift. Kind of like morning wood in my brain.
I'm doing somethin that's never been done before...the 10 am booty call come over
The 78 year old woman who works next to me divorced her ex husband, remarried her first husband, and retired all in one day. I'd say it makes your breakup on Valentine's day pretty insignificant.
How early is too early for a booty call on a Monday night?
I had sex in the back of a hot foreign guy with a lacoste eye patch's car
Just learned that the cute guy I've been flirting with at the beach this whole time is actually an inmate working in the community instead of being in prison.. My life is unreal
You’re like one of those doomsday preppers, but for your vagina
Well this guy just went into a detailed lecture about how rinos are developing into unicorns.. It's gonna be a good night.
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