Do you still like to have your hair pulled?
No, I never liked having my hair pulled. I think you have me confused.
i just won an entire level on word mole with the word 'clitoris'
How do you tell if you're on the terrorist watch list?
This morning I saw a frozen puddle in front of my RA's door and I laughed, assuming someone poured water in hopes that she would slip and fall. That's when my roommate told me I had peed there last night. Thank you Captain Morgan!
i was concerned for your health after you took your "last shot" four times...
she found me naked passed out on the toilet and i just kept repeating "i'm like elvis, but not dead."
Ill bet we could have atleast fucked a girl who fucked a guy who has fucked tara reid. That's a famous circle right?
no. it doesnt count as road head if youre parked
I found a ladder. I don't know where I am. Gonna climb it. I feel like aladin
the boys love us. they call us "the stoner girl suite down the hall". not very inspired, but flattering nonetheless
They're fucking on the bed next to me. I took adderall and smoked so there's no fucking help for me.
not even kidding I just received the single most greatest head I have ever had.. It was unreal. It was like stick my dick into a silk bag of puppy ears.
I'm discussing Magic Mike with my mom and totally get why she thinks I'm gay.
when I found u, u were using a t-shirt for pants
Sober sex is weird like I didn't expect this when I got clean
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