I'm already going to be stripping so like pretty much you would just be watching me. Also we're watching twilight. again.
2:45a: Any chance you got 3000 bucks on you?
you hand the children out the window. i'll pour the drinks.
like stop trying to get a relationship out of this when i'm clearly in the drunken mistakes part of my life.
It sounds like I am drunk, but I am not. I just have a concussion.
I won't trust your judgement until the word stripper doesn't make me laugh
She bought my penis dinner and beer last night. Her words
I just figured out how I'm going to tie you to my bed. Hint: I may have to go to the auto parts store before you get here.
All I know, is I had green sex and beer and got driven home. That's it.
She looked so much better when u didn't look at her and the music was too loud to hear her
I've only fucked to 2 Fleetwood Mac songs, that must be why my life feels so empty.
chasing tequila with frosting. best baby shower ever.
wait you fucked a guy who wears k-swiss? seriously?
I know, im living my 7th grade dream
Wanted to let you know I hooked up with your brother.
i thought he was gay wtf
Im sorry for telling you id rather jump into traffic than date you again. I didnt mean to be so rude
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