I thought she had more class and brains than to date a complete numb-nut, drug addict, fuck up like him. People never cease to amaze me
I am coming home for anal
* a nap*
You decided to make a porno with gummy bears and things went downhill from there.
and that's why he's hiding in the taco suit
This is the last weekend of getting drunk and having sex all nite with the plumber. I'm exhausted all weekend and I'm never going to finish the remodel at this rate
Aaaaand I just watched him face plant in front of the taxi. This is why we don't invite him to margarita night.
I'm riding in a wheelchair, being pulled by a golf cart. You need to be here.
I am in my freshman residence hall trying to convince an Asian man to give me my pants back. Never. Drinking. Again.
My tits, and hanging out behind a hotel eating pizza.
He threw a twenty at the stripper and asked for change
well did he get it
....yes
Not too bad but came home early cuz business was shut down due to an employee sexually harrassing the inspector
Let's play another riveting game of "Whose boxers are hanging on my fence?"
I also have bagel bites. I know that's not as big an incentive as the cocksucking but.....
Don't drink and try to take a shower. I thought I was drowning
THEY WILL NOT STOP FLINGING CARDS AROUND THE ROOM! It has been four hours. HOW CAN IT STILL BE ENTERTAINING?!?! I will be under the table if you need me.
Randomize
