I'm kindof freaked out about my cock not getting up this morning. Cove over later so I can sort this out. Do not post this on texts from last night.
Damn that would have been a great one. Hahah and don't worry...
I have to get up uber early tomorrow. Which is why I started drinking early today
billy ray cyrus is narrating a show on the history channel. my iq cant decide whether to go up or down.
i was concerned for your health after you took your "last shot" four times...
sometimes i think i'm bisexual but then i realize the only girl i'm attracted to is myself.
we traced the origins of this shit fest of a relationship back to a single instance of road head. then we did a reinacment
Heard puking from next door. Looks like the third floor won't be any different than the second.
I'm not sure if I should be proud of you for having morals or disappointed in you for letting your sex life get this sad.
I rang in the new year by giving a lap dance to a Lutheran minister in a roomful of people including his wife. Jesus would be proud.
Sloppy and selfish. Your 27 and you don't know where my clit is? BYEEE
No like I actually peed on the treadmill. As it was running
Trusting in Jesus is not a viable birth control plan.
Update: I spent 10 minutes trying to fish out a rogue vagina weight.
she said she doesn't remember seeing me at all last night. ...I was with her for six hours, there's no way she could have been blackout the whole time
i have a serious question for you... Why I am i not wearing any pants?
Randomize
