batman just walked across the sidewalk
lay off the drugs
no for real he was wearing a cape
drug dealer added me on facebook, win ?
omg no way im finding him!
he has no pics of his face, and im always drunk so i cant remember if hes cute or not, but he told me im in his phone as "party girl" which is fitting i guess cause im dragging my hungover ass to buy preggo tests, and i had to get the cheap ones cause i blew all my cash on coke.
no homo or anything but the way you were dancing with that girl gave me a boner
I just saw a homeless man with a cat on a leash. reminded me of you.
he yelled 'rock me amadeus!' when he came
i love that song!
NOT THE POINT
The camp director doesn't care if we drink and i'm running the rifle range. Someone is going to get sued.
yeah, and when i walked in on them fucking he said "go away, i'm making sons."
How do guys with small dicks who cheat on their girlfriends get girlfriends!?!
Well when you're drinking tequila mixed with water out of a steve Austin cup I really don't think acquiring a straw is your main priority
I was fingering her, she was moaning, and we were singing Mulan
I fell asleep to him stroking my ass calling it his precious.
Is "when in doubt date the guy with the bigger dick" a good philosophy?
Fine line between drunken accidental sleepover with your best friend's lab partner and gay sexathon. I did a cartwheel over that line. A CARTWHEEL THAT LANDED IN HIS LAP
IT'S A GIANT FUCKING ROBOT, DUDE. LOGIC IS OUT OF THE QUESTION BECAUSE AWESOME.
..and by hang out i don't mean fucking then going back home i mean let's get something to eat & watch a movie and fuck sometime in between.
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