with your own penis?
Yeah, it was perfect until the end. Apparently women are super attracted to me until the sleeping with part.
i had a dream that i had so much marijuana that i didn't know what to do with it. i woke up and cried.
I'm bringing in a picture of a stranger on facebook to get my haircut. I have reached a new level of creepy.
You hit on my mom and then passed out in the kiddie pool.
And with me just getting pulled over and you maxing your card out on tennis balls I don't know if we can afford it
I have to talk to myself and be all "you are NOT horny tonight"
I have discovered that there is nothing that a giant penis attached to a southern accent can't talk me into. yee-haw!
He passed out naked in my bathroom, then took a shower, then passed out again and then took another shower. Last time I let my brother visit.
My contribution to the dinner party was a bottle of vodka and a bag of uncooked potatoes. I felt like a Russian serf.
I wanna just rip ass and see his reaction but i bet itd be better to shatter that illusion when hes drunk
My gay card got upgraded to platinum status today.
Walked in on my roommate covering his dick in blue frosting. Am staying with my folks for the Forth. See you Monday if the brain bleach works.
I don't want to go back to the suburbs. Being drunk in public isn't ok and theres too many children. Don't make me.
I feel like it's the kind of place that would appriciate my Aladdin vest
Randomize
