So I just passed a billboard for "Risque Cafe: Good food and topless women". Fuck. I love SC.
Beach body diet is off. Pizza hut worked its way back onto my google chrome top 8
I mean, it's free alcohol, to turn it down would be a crime against humanity.
She deep throated me and when I woke up she made me pizza. I was full of emotions I started to cry.
they just started filling water ballons with vodka.
on my way.
Drunk me thinks I can light up a cig anywhere, sober me finds this hilarious and highly irresponsible. The grocery store is not a bar.
I'm sorry I can't get drinks with you. I have to make sure my dad doesn't go to jail.
I just sold some kid a bong I made out of a vuvuzela for $50. I think I found my career path.
Sorry we couldn't "turn off the mirrors." How're you feeling today?
I overcharge people for their weed so you can have yours for free, because I care
Getting your clit pierced is not something you want to trust to a crazy girl with an ice cube, some vodka, and a sewing needle. Trust me. I learned that the hard way.
It's statistically impossible for there not to be at least one guy sexting you right now
I'm on the same pooping schedule as a professor I've never had. He now says what's up to me in the hallway
No I did a yoga dvd and hit my ex up via email for some pot in exchange for his mail.
Why do my weekends always degenerate into using my little brothers childrens board games for drinking games?
Randomize
