FYI... At my funeral, it will be your job to throw yourself dramatically onto my casket.
I feel like our bond is deeper now that we're both sleeping with married men. now we're really bffls
I hope whoever gets these locks of love doesn't have a drug test anytime soon
once i realized i was actively trying to drink the beer i was sweating out of my body i knew it was time to go to bed
I mean I woke up wearing my bathing suit which blows my mind
you inspire me to be a worse person
I woke up using a pile of socks as a pillow. I think theyre clean so thats a plus.
Yeah. I don't think I have anything left in me tho. I think I was throwing up tangible memories at one point.
Seriously. I'm like, "Wait, we are actually talking about physics in the middle of sex and its ACTUALLY erotic because you're so fucking intelligent I'm turned on?"
I've literally NEVER been on a date or gotten through one episode of netflix without having sex like I JUST WANT TO WATCH TRUE DETECTIVE
I just wanna get drunk in a castle. Is that so much to ask?
I like that you use a Disney movie to describe the starting of our BDSM relationship, lmao
i have nothing going on in my life. unless a toxic love triangle with netflix and jack daniels counts.
you got into a really intense arguement about protecting bees. it was wierdly arousing.
It baffles me why I still wear white underwear...
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