UPDATE: In a passionate fit of self love, I brought myself to orgasm under the moon on my 7th floor balcony, ejaculating between the rungs towards the ground.
Unfortunately, I did not realize that most of it would end up on the balcony below mine.
At least you don't cum in color.
my debutante medallion kept hitting his balls when i went down on him
Somehow he came on his own face...then he freaked out
Just filled up my pledge keg goblet with coffee at bp. They can judge all they want. At least I'm not killing baby dolphins.
My younger brother just got high fives from all my guy cousins for fucking my best friend. I hate family gatherings.
Even with having the shower running and music on everyone could hear the alcohol gods making me sacrifice my dignity and meals from the past week.
Well, let's see..I held him while he cried for 30-40 minutes, woke up on his couch AND he gave me a ride home in his underwear. Shit show is not even the half of it.
Vaguely remember? You pushed George and two other fellas out the way to hug me, screamed gandalf before chugging your beer and smashing the bottle on the floor. I lolled.
I think I just cured my dogs munchies
By the way I got my period today. No NHL babies for me.
We've been watching Scooby Doo and having sex for the past 36 hours, so life is great
I took the beard trimmer to my balls this morning.\nMuch blood. Much blood from my scrotum.
Sorry about the confusion with the nudes last night that was rude
I'd like to thank Vicodin for getting me through family thanksgiving once again.
He cut off part of his middle finger playing the knife game while singing The Knife Game Song at the top of his lungs. He also scream like a girl when his finger hit the floor and he realized he fucked up.
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