I'm in your bed right now
Okay meet you there give me 10
Don't think you can make me leave either
Give me ten I ha e to be ******'s wingman I want you
I just pooped in his toilet and didn't flush...I desperately need to get him past the girls don't poop phase.
And now we have yet another reason to never travel to Detroit
Her parents came home early, i had to hug her mom with a condom on...
I have no idea what's going on.... I just want to wear my horse sweatshirt and drink vodka.
BEST FEELING EVER: Standing in a hot fucking shower, while super baked, while eating a cookie.
You eat cookies in the shower?
Asking the homeless man what buss shelter is the warmest was not a good idea
My hands always smell like pizza crust when im hungover.
Do you ever actually plan things? Or is it always drugs then whatever happens? I'm considering being worried about you
We hooked up with 2 friends last night as always and she stole their fucking cocaine and I just had to drive to their house and make her give it back to him hahshshahahah only me
Who else will cuddle and watch the Bachelor with me then finger bang me during the rose ceremony
I'm eating go-gurt and drinking beer alone in the dark. This is why you shouldn't marry young.
Will u lay on an air mattress with me and drink vodka while we listen to Rick James?
she was sitting with her tits completely out.. on the kitchen floor..eating pickles by the handful... rapping mac dre... and then lit up a cig and continued...that drunk
i only got to wear my halloween costume for an half hour before it got taken off.
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