Did you hit it?
Turns out she was a he. but to answer your question, yes.
We shared that special kind of eye contact that can only be experienced when you know one party is saying "Oh god, I fucked him in the back seat when you were in the front, didn't I."
Made a joint out of my Yale rejection letter. Life is grand.
I have no idea what's going on.... I just want to wear my horse sweatshirt and drink vodka.
We used the solo cup bag for her hair tie. Desperate times call for desperate measures.
Why do you need me to cover for work?
I wouldn't say NEED but lets just say I smell like guacamole and semen.
I swear she lies about being allergic to gluten so she'll get all the jack and not have to drink shitty beer like the rest of us
I hooked up with a British man... Wiz Khalifa has your bra... Couldn't have been a more successful night!
2 hours later, she made her cat watch the waterfall scene from Homeward Bound to teach her how good she has it here.
thanks for piggy backing me around for the rest of the night when I got too drunk to stand.
No you don't understand. This tree is really alive. Like in Pocahontas.
I got into a fight with the dude who fell asleep on my couch bc he wouldn't wake up but managed to get a lunch date set for thurs with another guy by the time he finally left. So how's your day so far?
I'd just like to formally thank you for the size of your dick. The gods must really love you.
I do NOT want my proposal story to start "...he was peeing on me and then..."
For someone who's supposed to be gay Greg is really good at seducing me into things I don't wanna do
Randomize