She was not exactly lady-like. Down there.
OMG THIS GUYS LICENSE PLATE IS GETTNHRWET
You found Muppets From Space a little too intense, so you just sorta sat on the ground and stared at the wall plug for an hour and a half.
She's a squirter....that makes up for lots of other annoying things
Homecoming wouldn't be the same without all the drunk old people puking on the street.
Oh wait looks like my cousin is getting deported THERE'S HOPE FOR THIS CHRISTMAS YET
Not that you went to little darlings at 3am. But that you checked in on Facebook. C'mon bro. You're better than that.
Nothing says I'll be 22 tomorrow like washing the vomit out of your hair at 4pm
How could she say that about my foreskin when she hasn't even seen all the cool stuff I can do with it?
I'm dipping store brand pepperoni pizza in bacon flavored ranch dressing. Obesity tastes so good.
Nope. Turns put my desperate group message for sex didn't work out.
Well you sent it to two guys who were roommates.
They could have rock paper scissored for it. My vagina = the prize.
The woman in the flower onesie is claiming she hasn't been drinking.
just woke up with nickles taped to my body. theres like a dollar worth.
i'll explain later but cookie monster is playing the xylophone
Didn't know my clit could produce that many orgasms in one night. Fuck my husband; think I might have to become a lesbian.
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