i will soon be in a relationship on fb
you!?
me and your mom. i mean, lisa.
It smells like Drakkar Noir and desperation out here.
That's why you should quit smoking.
I googled Canada's legal age of consent. I have good news. It's 14. Justin Bieber here I come...
Just ate lunch with a paperclip again. Seriously, need to invest in plastic forks.
do you wanna get some fucking pussy tonight.....THEN DRESS LIKE IT
Just disregard the tooth in the plastic bag in the fridge.
ya i guess you have to take things with a grain of salt in a place where nipple clamps are the norm..
he said he did everything he could to puke on his nurses because they were doing everything wrong
Thats admirable.
I was more obsessed with the sweat stain on her back that was simultaneously shaped like a vagina and the virgin Mary.
Good thing I left work early to shave my balls because traffic sucked ass, which I was written up for and my reason on the write was "to close on time, have to shave balls for date tonight". Oh yea, that was a bold statement right there
why does CNN give a flying $@*# about the royal baby so, so much?
i hope they name him Joffrey
We will go to karaoke
Okay, well, i'm covered in paint, haven't showered & have already been drinking, so if I fall on the floor in a blaze of depeche mode & beer tears, you can't pretend you don't know me
Until you can top getting paid to have women tell you to check out their ass, my job will remain better than yours
I DONT HAVE THE SOCIAL SKILLS TO EXPLAIN THAT YOU DIED EATING MY PUSSY
would it be okay if I showed up at your house naked? and is your door unlocked?
Randomize