idk hes just been lookin at me weird all night
he probably just wants to cut your skin off and wear you like a body suit
Yea i traded my bed for half a bag of jimmy johns jalepno chips, am I proud of it no, Am I happy I did it? yes
Hopefully. Play it cool. Bust out a few jokes. Chew with your mouth closed and show your boobs.
He gave up on mugging us when Dave wouldn't stop laughing. He was wiggling his finger at the knife and making baby noises and giggling. The guy just walked away.
I cartwheeled across every street... They tried to stop me but I bit anyone who came near me
all my mom knows is what I put on facebook. So... I mean... She knows we drink a lot.
Well he just said "there's glass on the floor and it's okay I'm only bleeding out of my esophagus" so yes he's tripping
Sad Megan is Sad
Have you been drinking my beer?
It's titled "A countdown to death. A psychological look at the downward spiral of actress Lindsay Lohan and her inevitable Hollywood demise" This dissertation is genius. Not a single sober moment for either Lindsay or myself. Good stuff!
so I'm staring at this cat and wondering..is the tail of the cat the derivative of it's head?
stop getting stoned after studying for a calc final.
She's walking to the bar while holding a fifth of fireball, talking on the phone and puking like its nothing out of the ordinary
I wanna hang out. The cats don't talk back.
I may have interrupted sex but im bringing them both to McDonalds. Am I not the greatest older sister ever?
....even the bartender was embarrassed for her
operation Bang Australian Boy = oh so successful
Randomize