if you don't let us come over today i'm not taking the second plan b pill. your call.
Just so you know.. I just graduated college with your name still written on my chest
If that doesn't scream bromance I dont know what does
I'm on my fifth double. This night is getting better whether it likes it or not.
theyll ask where you are and ill say on a date crying in a sombrero
like that time i did too much ghb at gay pride
our flight took off 8 am and the bar didn't close til 5, so we decided it was a good idea to just stay out all night. Drunk logic is awesome. We were all scared we wouldn't get let onto the plane
No more cocaine. I spent two hours in my bathroom convincing myself I was ugly. Is this what a period feels like?
You're the worst gay friend ever.
Is it true if I say your name three times, you'll appear and whore everything up?
Holy fucking shit the worst thing for a hangover ever--A FUCKING BOLLYWOOD MOVIE BLARING IN CLASS
He might not have any marketable talents, but the kid dry humps like no other.
damnit. I just found my cousin on tinder.
Jesus, I think this onesie was designed to keep me from masturbating.
I was drunk and gave him my dad's phone number instead because somehow I thought that'd be funny. Man did that fucking backfire
Don't be hating on my everclear. Never taken a smoother journey into intoxication.
I will pepper spray him so fast I don't even care
We were too tired to finish having sex so we just stopped to eat the cheesecake and passed out. I didn't mind
Randomize