Lol speaking of weird...he just sent me a naked pic of himself that said "meow" at the bottom.
Don't use my boy Weezy to support your whoreish tendencies.
i have some very unhappy turtles in my backseat
Do fat girls normaly have fat that look like a penis by their pussy?
What the hell did you do last night?!
i ran around the party telling everyone that my favorite sexual position was also the only position that made me queef...i kept calling it the "double edged sword"
just shottied a beer can with a pumpkin carver. i love October.
just stole 2 cases of forties from some freshman in the woods by pretending to be a cop. that ten dollar spotlight is really turning a profit
he gets drunk and then tries to eat the lasers at the dance club
Barack Obama mentioned plan B and suddenly this address seems a lot more personal
I wonder if that one guy remembers you sticking salami to his forehead when he was passed out on new years eve.
He brought a girl home so fat he called me before they got home to unlock the right side of the French doors
Fuck he won the bet
What if everything solid was made of oreos and everything liquid was wine
I just got chills
So his roommate walked in on us, went upstairs to tell her bf she has found a new use for the rafters & they must try it.
Sometimes a man just deserves to get woken up with a blowjob.
Call me a snob but I'm not banging chicks with more fingers than teeth.
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