i hate having sex with him only a few drinks in. i like it better when i cant remember the gory details.
i just watched my husband get a prostate exam. sex is ruined for me.
im naked on webcam to her boyfriend, but im playing neopets at the same time, so its all evened out
it was really awkward..i thought he had two dicks, but later realized it was jsut his roommate
well other than the faint smell of fireworks in the truck you can't really tell the windshield was exploded
you can think of my virginity as your little souveneir from our relationship.
They invented the twister shot game. You put a shot on each circle, take it when you land on it, and if you fall, they funnel the mat and make you drink it. New best friends.
I may have made out with a tranny last night, which, if I don't get fired for everything else that happened, really makes last night epic.
I am a murderer. I ran over so many baby frogs. I wanted to stop and pick some up to take home, but all I have is a wine bottle. I'd hate to explain that to a cop.
The best was when you were crying, and trying to get the bouncer to "understand you AS A HUMAN BEING"
Like I could say no to two hot people already naked and fucking. Please. I'm not made of stone.
Twice?!
First of all she starred talking about God which immediately killed my buzz
I'm pretty sure I went in the girls bathroom and vomited everywhere then looked for a urinal for like 20 minutes
I will be wearing a suit out more cuz it has been decided i rage harder with a power tie
I don't feel like that was meant as a compliment, but really still feels like one
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