Cool, I just put that together. I didn't know if using a tie-died sub machinegun was too crazy
Grow some girl-balls and come out already
Is it weird that I miss finding cum in my bed?
There aren't nearly as many guys masturbating on chatroulette as i was led to believe...i feel cheated
She was singing my heart will go on into her barf bag. celine aint got shit on her.
Who would have thought google would have HELPED me fail a test...not pass...thank you pacman, thank you google....
you're the only person I know who would bring a water bottle of screwdriver to a wedding, and toast with it during the speech
He bought me Ben & Jerrys and then apologized for the fact that he was going to fall asleep before we could have sex
Im drunk on a hayride surrounded by toddlers. they are judging me.
Look at my eyebrows in this pic! We deffo need to go back to that waxing place.
You have a cock in one hand and a shot in the other. Your eyebrows are not the topic in need of discussion.
The dopest dose you'll ever dose. I felt like an octopus all of thursday
I'm totally wasted about to ride water slides. That's goddamn 'Merican. That and Clint Eastwood.
His ass WILL be my cock's next vacation home.
I wish I had a dick so I could say shit like that.
The only people who really get me are strippers and mascots for sports teams.
Imma make him fuck me with my jersey on tonight while I chant Go Jets Go. Gotta love playoff hockey szn.
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