i know we just met, but i forget your name, and i'm wondering why my penis burns?
After I talked about my ex for about twenty minutes, she just listened, sluts are so understanding
here I sit at Southern Illinois' finest pubs and I thought I heard your laugh. I was sadly astonished to turn and find a midget cracking herself up reading the label on her can of chewing tobacco...
By the way, she says hi. At least I think she did since she licked my phone
i don't even specifically remember last night, it's just one big wonderful lesbianic blur.
Question. Will thrown up fruit loops go down the shower drain?
I have a beer in one hand and a slim fast in another. It's another one of those wednesday nights.
You were yelling at the bowl of salad and telling it to quit taunting you and telling you to go to tacobell
I'd just like to inform all involved that walking into a liquor store holding a milk crate at the beginning of a night as stock ends badly
got blackout drunk at the conference and wandered around Minneapolis with a homeless person until one of the other interns found me...I think I'm ready for adulthood.
Just got back from the tanning beds. I'm a lobster. I fear for the safety of my nipples falling off.
Then that means he's outwardly conservative. Inwardly he's a total gay horndog. He's like a spy that can ruin conservative plans.
I want to change all my life goals to that.
If drinking had a "new high score" I think I hit it this weekend.
After we had sex he began to tell me the craziest places he's had sex. He told me KFC bathroom so I rolled over and went to sleep.
If pulling your dick out counts as a hobby that is his.
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