used his ipod to set the mood...1st song was livin on a prayr 2nd song was disco stick
i expected more from guys that i meet at the jersey shore.
you made me "pop lock and drop it" as a sobriety test last night..
passed a homeless guy with a sign that read "420 vetran" we gave him a bowl of bud
I went from innocently day drinking to waking up handcuffed in jail. Fuck you game days
im sure shes a lovely person but i cant be friends with someone that doesnt drink. its just not right.
Puuuub goooolf. Being trashed at 830 never felt so right
Dude what hole are you on?....and its 9:15
hole5. 2 under par. irish nachos
and I keep making him eat me out and buying me presents, this is paradise. I wish he cheated on me earlier.
Like, he's a nice guy. But he's better at fingering than he is at speaking.
Dude, chad is laying across the room, violently, passionately, pornographicly eating something and I seriously think the 'some thing' is fighting back.
You know you're a fat kid when you've spent half the day having a twitter conversation with Pizza Hut.
your body is your temple. do you really want a bunch of dicks in your temple?
as much as I don't like snorting drugs, I would totally be fine with someone doing a line off my ass. that's just a whole new up
did I ever tell you about my gay jesus theory?
I DO have hobbies! I drink. I drink more. I catfish men on Grindr with photos of guys who are less attractive than me. I listen to Lovecraftian podcasts. I'm very well-rounded.
I blame her lesbian super powers of coercion.
Randomize
