I didn't exactley write on my bucket list -- "hook up with a townie at a drivers intervention program"
Just so you know I would totally fuck you. Does that count as a feeling?
I think I'm going to make a pina klonopin before class.
I got my project done and a booty call in all before 1am. I'm a professional college kid.
he had me stop mid-blow job to make me use my phone to id a song on the radio..
i wasnt really sure how to responde to that.
You need to let him know my only agenda is coke and sadness.
You're the only person I know who would be upset about making out with a girl you like. You're like a drunken Charlie Brown.
Not blacking out at our finals party is my Everest
Bring a bathing suit and your good liver.
My good liver is still at the dry cleaners. Will my backup liver suffice?
Maybe
She went outside in nothing but her panties and came back inside 15 minutes later wearing a different pair of panties.
He fell into the beer pong table and broke it. Then he threatened to throw the toliet at us if we didn't let him keep playing
I have never paid for drugs and I'm sure not going to start today especially on a holiday
Is it bad that I tried to build an outfit based around "What do people who use condoms look like when they buy condoms?"
It was an interesting experience to have sex while there was a triathlon going on right outside my bedroom window because it sounded like everyone is cheering for you in bed.
How supportive!
I dunno. The drunker I get, the easier econ gets. I may be onto something here.
Randomize