Do you think red sox nation has an official powerpoint template/memo format for resignations of manny support, bandwagon applications, and other official business?
some old guy just shit himself in my section. everyones leaving
Neighbors just bought a new bong. Got high with them and we decided to name it "Gary colemans sweet sugarlumps" these guys are hilarious
Apparently tackling a bar stool and crashing to the floor while yelling for 6 shots of whiskey won't get you thrown out on St Pattys Day.
Should study in library more often, procrasturbating is less of an option.
I am unable to type or say "unprotected, receptive anal sex" with a straight face. clearly, HIV was a poor research paper topic choice.
These shoes are like walking on sunshine and labias. So soft and squishy
And then. You beer bonged 3 tall boys. In a row. Fell into some kids lap. And pulled down my shirt trying to get up. Thank you for that. I got laid
That place is a DUI and an STD waiting to happen. I think I'll pass.
Ugh contemplating vodka and chocolate protein powder as this Capri sun and vodka isn't really cutting it
And now you understand the importance of Saturday naps.
Because you stay up all night having sex and eating sushi?
I just broke a sweat masturbating on a Friday night. I may need a boyfriend.
in the middle of telling this chick to sober up i was shotgunning beers. im gonna be ab awsome nurse.
Everyone needs to leave the house so I can use the good vibrator without being judged.
Oh no. He's definitely text-flirting with me. No straight man over 30 has any other excuse to use so many smiley faces...
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