the line at the liquor store is out the door, and students in line are high-fiving like crazy...i love college snow days
i stopped calling them hangovers and started calling mornings a long time ago.
ra ra ra ah ah
wtf?
sexting lady gaga style
it's like god just wants me to be high for five days in a row. keep the blizzards coming.
The vomit I understand but how is there seaweed in my bed?
I have an odd instinct I wont find my underwear tonight
I decided they need a food cart that just roams around the library like the cotton candy people at the circus. But with real food. like tacos cause it sounds delicious.
A lot of things don't look good... It doesn't look good for a lifeguard to be smoking a cig and drinking from a conspicuous cup... But hey I'm doin it
Any formal decision about whether we're planning to objectify naked women with daddy issues tonight?
The number of males in the usa getting circumsized are decreasing. Keep this in mind when we become cougars
Get in your clown car, pick up everyone you know, and head to the park. drunk Sledding grand prix tonight. winner takes home the leftover beer
I come from a long history of big boobed German, Swedish, and Irish women. And then there's me. Mother nature was like "Naaaaaaah."
he started frosting cupcakes and licking the mini-spatula realllllly deliberately and i don't know if i'm more attracted to him or the cupcakes
I am going to bedazzle the shit out of your Basilisk costume.
I was singing Colors of the Wind and swigging vodka and still felt like more of an adult.
Randomize
