ya ever know whats down there. always send some fingers in first to scout the situation. fingers are not used for pleasure. they're used for covert missions.
Now you know why i just sit on the toilet and scream
i'm thankful for my girlfriend's hot cousins....god, i love her family parties.
Dude they are all farmers and I'm pretty sure there's a prostitute here.
I'don't know who your are but its that time a day. Drunk it up. Did you buy a House for goundhogs days?
She was either really drunk or really not interested. Everytime I tried to ask her about herself she would respond with a line from Stepbrothers.
Your panties and toothbrush are in your mailbox. just not ready to be with anyone serious. take care.
drinking vodka, listening 2 smh at 530am slow cooking beef stew. you'll enjoy the stew and worry abt me in the morning. bon apatite
You left a motherfucking bruise. ON MY TIT. How? How do you even. No.
I would say I miss her friendship, then I remember that she gave 4 guys the clap. I'm good.
Smoking a bowl and ordering Dominos, you want in on either, both, or none?
Do not take the D yet, he needs to be worth it. Your Vagina is GOLD.
I took a dab in Denver and was I. Rocky Mountain national park almost to Wyoming before I realized I missed my turn.
Girl I'm contemplating picking up some adult diapers. That's how bad this is and it's only day 2.
I'm surronded by jorts. You're probably too drunk to care. I'm gonna cry now. Love you.
Randomize
