Hannah Montana > iCarly
I'm disregarding that text and your testicles entirely
So I just went to student health services and on my way in there was a girl outside on her phone saying "I just dont want you to be angry" and on my way out she was saying "I have the side effects sheet right here" Someone started the semester off classy
Just got arrested at PF changs. Happy New year, China
cliffnotes. writing studyguide on last pack of smokes. glad this semester is over.
ever have one of those nights where you feel like you should leave the house with your insurance card? that is tonight, my friend.
currently wearing a football players overly sized underwear. discovered a shot count on my leg. I'm a tank hahahhh
So I'm thinking next semester you should be my own personal maid, nurse, masseuse and chef in exchange for free lodging, any food you can find, and unlimited access to my reproductive organs.
I think it's starting to become crucial that I find a companion for my vagina.
I peed my pants walking home last night... I just kept walking.
There's nothing more awkward than going on a beer run with 3 ten year olds....teacher of the year right here!
Never should have deleted her from my facebook. My new girl is so much hotter than she is, I just want to passive aggressively rub it in her face
You will drink beer in a kiddie pool in your back yard but you wont bring a girl home
She rode me like a jockey on that tiny couch. Then we spooned.
I walked over and you were apologizing to him because you're lady gaga and he's not. The best part was that he forgave you.
Are you alone?
No, but I have to leave him in my bed while I go on this date.
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