My place. Tomorrow Night. Bring your liver, and something for it to do.
There's some strange man with hair that keeps talking to us. I'm scared.
This is how horror movies start. Going to bar with strange hair guy. He's paying. Bad idea?
Ditched hair man. Got free cab ride to market. Want food. I win.
he wanted to have me eat skittles off of his body. he mad gay sex even gayer.
she was throwing up and singing "I HAD a feeling that tonight was going to be a good good night." And yeah she was still in her dress.
He told me he was a psychology major, and I responded by asking him where he hid his vagina.
we just drove by a car that was painted for a grad, it said "you done it!" with a confederate flag bumper sticker next to it. i love kentucky
It'd be like medium rare by now.
I love how we're talking about your vagina like it's a piece of meat.
He doesn't like you, he likes u not having a gag relfex
I have fruit by the foot roll-ups. I wonder if a man could tie them together and make an editable bra....
Some lady old enough to be our mom took us home, made me eggs and he still got some. Where do I claim my best wingman/sister trophy?
LEAVE ME AND MY NIPPLES ALONE
my gynecologist gave me a high 5 for not getting any STD's since my last visit and said "Way to go Annabeth!" you have twenty seconds to get to my level
it's like he didn't even know what a vagina was
Is it weird I can only picture you in my heels naked?
Be proud; I'm a versatile boyfriend
The hump and dump is a beautiful thing
Randomize
