I feel like this whole "telling that guy i have a kid to avoid him" thing is getting out of hand..
How so?
Probably at the point when i told him i was "Too drunk to drive" and "had to pick up my kid" all in a span of like 2 hours.
Well unless he sent his sperm via fedex, this baby isnt his
Hint of advice dont get with minor league baseball players, you can google their stats but not their stds.
Well, I wanted to be you for Halloween but I couldn't fit seven dicks in my mouth.
Once he blows his load, he's more of an immediate flight risk than that jetBlue pilot. He's out the door before his cum is out of my vajayjay.
Yea he called the cop officer fonzarelli and asked him if he was mad because happy days was off the air. Boom, beaten and arrested
there is a guy passed out on top of me and i don't know what to do. help if you're awake? was anyone anyone expecting someone? maybe he found the wrong room?
also I woke up naked and covered in water but nobody can explain that part.
I went through his pics. Will you go with me to get tested?
Once again I am on the toilet and refuse to get up
What a great time to reflect on life
On a Thurs night I found myself drunk in a limo w 9 dudes on my way to a strip club. Once there I was handed $100 in ones and told "spend it." I need a husband. Or Jesus.
I threw up in a flower pot outside the bar last night and have a date tonight....I think I missed something
can you please not set my house on fire for once???
I need to immerse myself in a tub of peroxide to kill whatever traces of him are on me.
I'd kiss your neck and collarbone and then run my tongue up your neck to just behind your ear
And then lightly kick the curve inside your ear
Randomize
