why is there a picture of someone wearing Tevas with socks taped on the wall?
You gave him your vagina and this is what I get in return? This is bullshit!
I just saw fred flintstone in my fruity pebbles!
what drugs are you on?
none, cept for the pain medication i got prescribed by the doc: it said 2 pills every 3 hours, but I took 6 cuz i'll be away from home later
left comments onEVRY SINGLE1of my posts n status updates.Im done dating freshmen
Puked on a Tom Jones impersonator on the strip
So you know that marine I slept with, well his girlfriend just told me I was pretty, I almost feel bad for sleeping with him now...
Dont! You were just serving you country
we made malted milkshakes. malt as in malt liqour.
Night out in new white coat = success. Offered free breast exams all night, two took me up on it, woke up with one. I love medical school!!!
On the way home she put on a necklace with her name on it and wrote my name in sharpie across my chest so that in the morning we could avoid the awkward Idk who the fuck you are conversation. Best. Girl. Ever.
Some guy in lab is humming along to a Sara Barrilles song. Or maybe I'm just hearing the song echoing in his huge, gaping vagina.
It's like they're playing jeopardy and the category is "things that make women dry."
How do you make a Facebook status saying how much you fucking hate yourself without being aggressive enough for people to worry about your safety
Cuz that's where I'm at
A bitchslap is in order.
She stood up through my sunroof the entire drive home. screaming her ass off and singing free falling..
I'll get the most aesthetic strap on, you'll see
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