why the FUCK would i wear makeup on my vagina!?
On a scale of one to trashy, how is this: Got drunk, gave a guy a hand job. In the middle of the bar
I think you broke the trashy scale
Just mixed my liver cleanse with Bacardi. Best. Thing. Ever.
It's ok. Rob's just shotgunning upside down.
He makes this seasoned whore feel like a novice. I've met the one.
At least she'll always have a story about the time she showed up to the emergency room drunk and covered in chocolate syrup on her birthday.
I like making it seem like it's at least a little bit difficult to hook up with me
I can't help but look at my sex life and acknowledge that this is not normal behavior.
If my neighbors have super loud sex again tonight, I'm going to leave a ball-gag and roll of duct tape in their mail slot.
Your brother's naked in the courtyard again. Just a head's up.
I just wanna get drunk and watch Tarzan with you is that to much to ask?!?
I just put vagisil on my bug bites how do you think my morning is going
Are you vicariously golddigging through me?!
I remember the Prince Albert and the three penises in the threesome. But the rest no.
Ccatlin cimbing thru th sunroof plz come
Randomize
