69 |D_O
wtf does that mean??
it's a very specialized emoticon, means 'i heard you fucking some dude through my bedroom wall last night and so i listened intently"
Omg just saw this kid I went to elementary school with at the bar and he used to be cool and I was so awkward but now I have boobs so I WIN.
Do you remember when I jumped into your arms and you farted?
if i remember New Year's Eve then there is something seriously wrong.
the coke olympics were a bad idea. there's a tree uprooted in the front of my building.
Vodka is such a love hate relationship.
Truer words have never been spoken.
He asked me to grab his balls and yell "thats a spicy meat-a-ball" Last time I do requests.
Your scrotum should have touched every square inch of that place by now. Start with the water fountain.
Totally passed out on the dealers bed after paying him all in ones so no, i dont think i'll be getting a discount soon.
my mom found me passed out in the kitchen floor with the Brita pitcher.. Happy Mothers Day
No more. You can't have nice things, and vodka is a nice thing.
she sent me a picture of dilf asleep in bed with the caption "what happened last night?"
LEAVE ME AND MY NIPPLES ALONE
DETAILS
long story
just tell me the parts i wanna hear
weed, brooklyn, rough sex.
why does every cop we meet know your name?
Randomize
