Oral text is very safe with the right protection.
as for my dating sex life, no more regret sticks. Only pride wands from now on.
you handled that situation with as much grace as someone puking involuntarily could
don't think this is any sort of attachment thing but if I'm going to throw up regularly at your house, I'm going to keep a tooth brush there
That sucks. I just talked to a telemarketer for 15 minutes about CSI: Miami and weed.
her body is proportioned like a family guy character
Bro you fell face first into the sand and then balled up into the fetal position and yelled help untill I picked you up, no more whiskey for you...
I've just been thinking about sangria a lot lately, like an adult.
I just fucked her in the corner of an ally while holding a large pizza waiting on a pledge for a ride.
Apparently calling shotgun while getting put into a police car is frowned upon
This is why I only drink in places with a C or D health rating
I just watched an intern spill two trays of coffee inside a spinning door
Best exit from a building ever
For a guy who came before his dick was out of his pants, he gave surprisingly good head.
I like to make sure they know it's casual by giving then a high five after sex
I left you a really long drunk voicemail and I remember something about a bat
Randomize
