I'm pretty sure "Like A Prayer" will forever remind me of drunk nights & pants down around the ankles
I really hope you aren't where I think you are. Dude she has a MUSTACHE. You need Jesus..
I give him a gold star every time I orgasm. His room looks like he's freaking King Midas.
when was she peeing in the stairwell? why dont i remember this?
....because generally we only remember 40% of the night each, and have to fill eachother in. And that still leaves 20% that we will never know and its probably for the best
but im not going to tell the owner of the penis of my dreams how to wear his hair.
Just out of curiosity. Did you wait until my fb picture was well liked by others before liking it so people won't know we're fucking?
No one is allowed to go to bed until all bottles are finished, I don't want to feel my face tongiht. Do you understand?
A little boy in a bathroom stall just shouted "mom where's your penis?? Is it inside you?"
His grandpa picked him up. Brought him to the house. And made him clean the puke off the driveway with a broom and a bucket of water.
I think I ripped my underwear last night doing drunk squats
Well puke fest 2014 just happened
Bacardi 151 is like a past nightmare I'm still curious about
EW HE LOOKS LIKE SOMEONE'S DAD
I just made mac at 3:10 am... My life is falling apart...
The playlist was "songs to sing in the shower". I literally got fucked to Footloose.
Randomize
