yeah she is the one who tells people i beat girls.. which ironically make me want to punch her in the face
Maybe i should go to church more so i can meet girls like in that song, you know, the ones that act slutty on every day but sunday...
ah, so the catholic church. i gotcha
you might get a letter about the baby you put in me. i was mad when i sent it.
he's a bartender at a gay strip club. maybe he can work his magic. with getting u in, not gay magic.
They are pre-gaming a trip to congress...not sure how politically correct the group is.
Everytime I sleep with him he gives me another hint to what his tattoo means. I'm like a slutty Nancy Drew.
I think I'm going to wait until after Halloween to call off the wedding. No need to ruin my favorite holiday.
she could've warned me his penis was curved
ya i dont think she expected you to get with her boyfriend.
We should search craigslist for porches to sublet.
He recognized me by my ass from about 15 yards away. I must have a REALLY nice ass.
Don't mind me. My boyfriend is carrying me because I'm broken not because I'm drunk.
It's not even 9:30 yet..
My father is flirting with a transexual server at hamburger mary's. We can never tell him.
I'm not over that dildo rifle story. I don't think I ever will be.
Come over.
Look lady I can't have sex with you EVERY day. I have things to do.
i had fun fun last night, with the exception of you running over my foot with your car. makes a great story for my first one night stand.
Randomize
