It's not just about fucking anymore... We decided we're actually in like now..
They call it the Collection Couch because all 4 room mates have slept with at least 3 different girls on it. He tried to seal the deal with "would you like to be number 14?"
And sadly I did.
And it was confirmed to me that I did in fact cut my girlfriend out of her dress with my sword.
Seriously. He was just sitting there naked in the dark with a boner pissed that I came home late.
she said we were using the spray butter as air freshener
Uhh, there's a legit bruise on my boob.. Again how does he manage this
HOLY SHIT HE'S TRYING TO EAT HIS FOOT. THIS IS THE BEST DAY OF MY LIFE.
For the first time in my 26 years of life, I'm washing jizz out of my ponytail.... High five yourself later.
i was sitting in the back of a squad car completely stoned watching airplanes take off
You seem to be avoiding the poop question. How did you poop on your hand?
Pussy, Peanut Butter Cookies,and Bubble Wrap
I can't be held responsible for another man's penis.
it's your last night here, let's make it one we may or may not remember.
I told him it was fine and then I keyed his car.
I don’t want to brag, but vows, morals and will power are no match for my blow job skills
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