no.. I went home. Puking up hot dogs and lemon tart isn't as lovely as it sounds.
so i woke up this morning covered in mail. none of it is mine.
Sorry for making you give strangers a ride for hits of acid.
No, "because my penis told me to" is not an acceptable answer to that question
You were fucking on a porch at a party, not much privacy should be expected
I found a half-finished mass text from my California weekend that said "things I want to rape: you, things, stuff, and le"
That sad moment when even your drug dealer lands a summer internship and you don't...
no, but he did start crying. who the fuck is 30, covered in tattoos and crys about an ex? get your shit together, man.
Hooked up with an ex Playgirl model. I feel like the universe just high-fived me for staying sober.
Her mom is a nurse who got called in to declare someone dead. Just got wing manned by a corpse.
I'm just more comfortable with the bondage
Glass of stolen champagne in a to go cup = tastiest hangover cure ever
Does puke ruin car paint? Good thing it's raining.
don't judge but I think I'm gonna go fuck a dad this weekend
I'm not gonna be naked if your not here. Thats like a waste of nakedness
Randomize
