Nothing too bad. Lost a stuffed horse on a stick and tore my clothes off. Again.
I called Tyra Banks a whore to her face. A sure sign I should go home. Instead I went to the gay bar.
Just burped. Tasted like beer and cherios...Beerios. This is gonna be quite a day.
yea pretty sure we followed the trail of your spaghetti-o vomit to find the car
as i creep her facebook pics from back in the day till now, i noticed that her lazy eye has gotten better
Apparently I promised a worker at La Siesta free English lessons to make up for vomming all over the little Mariachi band.
WHAT THE FUCK. SUCH A BAD IDEA. YOU'RE NO LONGER IN CHARGE OF NOSE SUBSTANCES.
Anal and Aoki tickets...I'd say I give pretty good Valentines Day gifts.
She was throwing my stuff away and then before I knew it she was sucking my dick. It was like some fucked up sour patch kids commercial
It's only slutty if you don't have his number. Unless there's a full moon. Then anything goes.
I'm drunk, we're losing, and I'm in the visitors stands. This is about to get ugly.
Cry into your wine glass and then drink the tears, it's like the fountain of youth
So apparently dinosaur erotica does, in fact, exist.
I have to have boobs, you have the charm and wholesomeness that gets boyfriends... And i have boobs
Our livers get a hall pass for 2020, right?
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