"must pass the hog line" should not only be used in curling. but also when we go out to pick up girls.
I guess you don't realize how much twelve bags of chips are, until they're all over your floor.
it took me 2 minutes to realize that it wasn't HER hand on my penis. First, and worst threesome ever..
So he thinks I sent him a picture of my boob last night, but it was really just a close up of my arm.
In class ... We were just assigned groups for the quarter... Remember that night we took shots from that guys pants? I now know his name
see these eyes, they just want to bone and go to sleep.
While you wait, fill out your state patrol application. Not trying to be your mom, I just really want to fuck a cop.
In honor of Sarah Palin's bday I suggest we watch Nailing Palin
There's a guy in a life size dick costume, and two guys with white shirts that are each half if a pair of breasts in a red bra lol. They came separate but when they saw each other there was some titty fucking in the street, it's only 11
holy fucking shit get me out of here. even the babies are wearing beanies
Who gets call-your-ex-from-4-years-ago drunk on a Thursday??
Woke up with two different pairs of pants in the pockets of a jacket.None of the above are mine.
I'll do anything with you, except downhill sports and butt stuff.
His PENIS is so fucking big that I always use caps, out of respect.
I s2g I’m about to get ghosted by a 34 yr old and my Oedipus complex cannot take it
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