508, what difference does it make? You were alone, anyway.
10 dollar pizza all the toppings you want. Wait Until You See This Pizza
I sold 10 pepperonis for 5 dollars last night....i fucking love drunk people
I'm sorry I kept calling you a pussy... but to be fair, you were being a pussy.
do you know how hard it is to walk a mile drunk on 151 it's hard yards are soft and every girl looks good
I have reached the state of intoxication where it is now a requirement to sit while peeing.
My Yoga instructor is playing the music from 'Requiem for a Dream' it makes me very reluctant to put my ass in the air
That's what you get for dating construction workers you meet in tunnels.
How are you going to come here and fuck on our couch ? That's everyones couch
just for future reference, lake water is NOT mix for hard stuff. nor is it an adequate substitute.
Two really nice girls helped clean the taco out of my hair.
He's drunk and I'm pain-killer high and we're about to watch fireworks at disney world. It's gonna be fucking magical
You continued to run around saying "free the nipple" while "taste testing" every liquor on the premises.
Good friends chat about sex - great friends ask about safe words.
She woke up, peed in the sink and then passed out again, it's only 2 in the afternoon
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