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Haha she couldn't find her dress in the morning. So she left it. How do the hell do I discreetly return that to her at work. More importantly, how did she discreetly do the walk of shame??
somehow you got everyone naked by playing strip rock paper scissors.
If there's ever a time when I've matured to the point that I don't want to look at camera-phone-titties, go ahead and bury me in a shallow grave by the railroad tracks.
you were on all fours yelling at the earth to stop spinning.
Did i throw a brick at someone last night?
who paints a picture of their own dick and sends it to people. i dont know if its borderline crazy or just fucking genius...
Well no need to be a stranger, even if you aren't interested in joining my bisexual polygamist marriage. New city, new friends.
Can you fuck me on the kitchen counter at some point? I'll lysol it after
Just had lapdance from stripper that had her 5th kid 28 hours earlier. A for work ethic.
let's be real here, you have a beautiful vagina. this kid is a doctors son. that's a remedy for beautiful rich grandkids. he is just trying water his family tree, and make sure he doesn't end up in some piece of shit adult home. go for it.
There's nothing wrong with using cocaine to keep my heart rate up in my fitness class.
You started having a threesome right in front of me.
lololol that's what happened?
Stephanie looked me right in the eye while she was going down on you. It made me really uncomfortable.
it's like my eyeball is being humped by my eyelid
He cut off part of his middle finger playing the knife game while singing The Knife Game Song at the top of his lungs. He also scream like a girl when his finger hit the floor and he realized he fucked up.
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