She has a t-rex face on a stuart little body.
chicago's viagra triangle is not unlike the bermuda triangle in thatt things just get lost...... planes, ships, dignity, virginity, etc.
how ive managed to spend 100$ at an open bar is beyond me.
That's the last time we joust in Radio Flyer wagons after margarita night.
toilet paper cling ons are not as adorable as the little red cub makes them look on the charmin commercials.
...She just said, "We've been blessed with good drugs lately."
there was 12 of us, girls included, shirtless and wielding swords as we bet on rock paper scissors in the middle of the bar. It was like Cinco de Mayo version of the Deer Hunter
you're being fucking weird and i don't like it. text me when you're not being the after picture on a poster for rehab
i'm scootering my little heart out so i'm not late for a weed pickup. this is the meaning of adolescence
I believe in using alcohol to heal from the inside. Not as a topical solution.
You're the common denominator of my blackouts.
You know you went through something intense when you actuallu applaud yourself for not shitting your pants
I left my ice cream out over night, it's melted, fuck this, I just poured Bailey's in it. Problems solved.
What is it in my brain that makes me look at a penis and think "that belongs in my mouth"?
The lady in the stall next to me just screamed "why are you so hairy!?" and "why can't you get any!?" to her vagina. WTF
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