weak ass sauce last night. waste of time. you suck. ps. your boobs are fake
well my last 2 orgasms were over shoe sales at macy's. what does that tell you?
Do you ever go through someone elses pictures and just appreciate the fact that youre not really friends with them?
she told me i should dip my dick in chocolate and then let her blow me since it was her 2 favorite things. weird or my new valentine for this year?
i just realized why god gave us younger siblings....to DD for us when we come home for the summers
5 out of the 6 of them cut their hands while trying to shot gun the beer, I had never seen balls attached to such patheticness
I swallowed for you. Answer the phone.
I am downstairs in the bar now having a beer...actually I ordered two beers and placed one across from me in front of an open chair. I did this for appearance sake, so nobody knew I was double fisting all alone. I'm getting hungry now. I'm thinking of ordering two meals just to keep appearances up.
Come find me, I'm the girl sitting alone in taco bell at 9 in the morning drinking concealed beer with a straw
Dude. All those hangovers I never had came back with a vengeance. I just opened the door of this car to barf. The car was not motionless. We are on the autobahn.
Just broke my collar bone. May not make it to the party.
He actually just looked up and said I'm gonna cum in my pants. and he did. no shame.
Romantically speaking, I want to sit on his face.
He literally just peed in a trash can in our room. It didn't even have a bag in it
Will keep you updated on the sexual orientation of my new guy
Randomize