Helping a hot freshman girl move in = 2 hours of my life One bottle of cheap vodkas = $10 Watching her do the walk a shame on her first morning away from home = Priceless
You know your in college when you decide house chores with games of beer pong...
We're knee deep in HJ's right now.
Hey. Hey you. Just wanted to let you know that I'm adorable. FUCKING ADORABLE. That is all. This update brought to you by our proud sponsor bud light.
Even her dad came up for the body shots. Wasn't sure what to do so I just laid there and let it happen...
he told her he was actually impressed that she had fucked more people in this house than the four dudes living in it.
Hate sex is good. Drunk sex is better. Combine those two however and you get the best experience of your LIFE.
My vagina bone hurts from grinding on that dude so hard.
She pulled vodka outta the dryer and told me to drink it
No lie. I was hooking up with a former football player at UT and mid-hookup I yelled "I'M FRATERNIZING WITH THE ENEMY"
Can I just skip the lesson I have planned for tomorrow and just teach my students about Prohibition using my impending hangover?
This is why american education is failing
Dude get here. I just re-invented nachos. For real though. They werent real before right now
I've covered myself in body paint in the likeness of R2D2 and I still didn't get laid. Please explain.
I think you're my feminist conscience sometimes.
My mom is worried I'm not eating enough protein so she's sending me 48 cans of tuna. That's not a typo.
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